Episode 80: An Awkward but maybe Inevitable Break Up

So this might not be that much of a surprise given how the last couple of months have gone. (Music fades in) Or it will be a major surprise if you’ve been super generous about giving me the benefit of the doubt. 

Regardless for a little while, Miscellany Media Reviews will have to reduce its upload schedule to biweekly uploads rather than weekly uploads. Basically, it comes down to a specific strain of creative burnout. Namely that I’m running out of topics. Coming up with them is an increasingly difficult activity, so for now, I need to take a step back and let the well refresh a bit or else I’ll just be pumping dry.

But because I did promise more podcast features, there will still be one of those at least every other month. If not every month. I mean, that corner of the well isn’t as dry. And there went that metaphor.

On the other hand, another reason for this is Miscellany Media Studios wants to do a more ambitious expansion in this year and the next, and we’re actually planning out our releases like any other media company should. So it’s going to be less hectic.

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Hopefully.

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I definitely feel like I shouldn’t admit this, for a number of reasons. First of all, there’s the fact that this is a deviation from a fairly standard and also insignificant social convention. Second, it goes against the very fact of my childhood and aspects of my identity then that probably carried over until today. Also, third and finally, though maybe I should have my tin foil hat on for this one, given Disney’s pattern of acquisitions, it isn’t impossible that they will one day come for Miscellany Media Studios, and then I would be in trouble for this episode. I mean, personally, I would never sell out. But how much of my choice would it be on this unknown date is also unknown. So you would think that I would prepare for every eventuality.

But regardless, I’m making this episode anyway. Because, I don’t know, I have thoughts that need to be said about Disney + and why, against overwhelming odds, I cancelled my subscription.

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Hi. It’s M. Welcome to Episode 80.

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Okay, so if you’ve been living under a rock for far too long, Netflix’s mere existence and the related but initially unexpected commercial successes led to a bunch of competitors to enter the streaming scene. Okay, it’s a bit more complicated than that, but that’s a version of the story that is quick to tell and gets to the point. And the point is: all the different media production companies and television networks have started pulling their content off of the established platforms in favor of developing their own. A series of events that is often called the “streaming wars” but could also just make it confusing for consumers just to know where to get what. I mean, there are other drawbacks to be had, and we’re seeing the consequences. but at the bare minimum, that part not going away.

But regardless, when Disney announced their own take on the concept, despite acquiring quite a bit of Hulu already, they were met with a great deal of excitement. After all, it’s Disney we were talking about. But the service itself, called Disney +, did not launch until late 2019. And it launched to great fanfare and excitement. 

And all of it, you would say, was fairly well founded. I mean, Disney + kept a lot of the initial promises. It opened up the Disney Vault to show off all the content that had first built this empire, a vast away of the Marvel and Star Wars content that Disney had carefully cultivated once it acquired those properties, and a bunch of new stuff as well.

And there was a lot of genius in that business model. It did not just maximize the potential of the catalogue of content Disney had both made and otherwise acquired across the years, and it was not just dependent on the array of content that Disney already had the full rights to. Disney + tapped into different impulses consumers of media have: nostalgia first and foremost, the need to catch up on certain intellectual properties that you had meant to go see in the theatres but time got the better of you, and there’s plenty of new stuff if you need something fresh or like being the content discoverer amongst your friends and co-workers. 

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Long time listeners of this podcast or people who just look at the premise of this show and are fairly good at guessing would have to guess that of the three prongs of Disney +’s marketability, nostalgia would have had the strongest appeal to me, followed closely by the need to play catch up pop culture-wise.

And yeah, for the few months, I did have Disney +, that was how I justified the expense. But then I spent most of my time watching all the Simpsons episode on the platform in reverse order. Why reverse order? Well, I don’t know exactly. It just seemed like a good idea in the moment. A moment in which I was home sick from work. Not sick of work, like legitimately sick enough to think that’s a reasonable thing to do when you have to manually cue up each episode after each episode. (Pause) It didn’t make great sense, but I did it anyway.

But once that was over, I knew my Disney + account wasn’t going to get the amount of usage I would want in order to justify paying every month. So I deactivated my account or canceled my subscription. Reactivating it when I’m really craving a Disney fix is an option. It will let you do that; you just aren’t eligible for any promotional offers. And on that, fair enough.

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But when I was a child, I had pretty much ever Disney VHS there was. Even the straight to VHS sequels or specials that Disney would release not exactly as a cash grab but as a way to give the second and third string animators some additional training and experience without suffering too much if any of a loss. 

As for why I had them when there was a noticeable dip in quality. For one, Mom and Dad wanted to make sure I was on top of all the social trends because I really needed to keep the training wheels on that proverbial bike. On the other hand, I wasn’t great at getting gifts for, so buying me a Disney VHS was an easy way for my parents to give me a gift and any other ideas they had could go to relatives I didn’t spend that much time and would be at a major disadvantage on that front. 

Both of my parents did it, but it was really my dad’s idea. And while my mom took me to the theatre and slept through the films she chaperoned me too, my dad did try to know what was going on and what were the stories I liked, even if he never saw them for himself.

Had he not died before I got to the point in my development when things like that are regifted or sold, I probably would not still have them. But as it stands and with the events turned out, I do. Complete with a VHS player that may not work anymore. I mean, I haven’t tried it. And even if I were inclined to try it, who could fix it if it doesn’t in fact work anymore? It’s a good thing I’m not interested then.

And that’s just it. Maybe you heard the beginning of this tale and thought that this was how I was getting that nostalgic-Disney-fix that you all know that I have. It would be a little eccentric, sure, but even the existence of this podcast nudges me a bit into the manic pixie dream girl category, so I don’t think it would be all that surprising.

But that’s not what happened. Despite those movies and television shows being something I genuinely enjoyed as a child and could rightfully call a staple of my childhood, I haven’t been. interested in streaming them. Or viewing them again. All sure.

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Because sure, some aspects or details of these properties haven’t aged well, but particularly for someone who grew up with them, there’s a certain aspect of it all that feels timeless. It’s like visiting an older relative. While you know there’s elements of them that really need to stay in the past…. There’s things they do and say that they really shouldn’t do and say, but all the say, you find yourself falling into the memories of the good times you all had together. Not so much into who they actually are but into the role they had in your life when you were young and vulnerable.

You needed them, and despite all their genuine shortcomings, they were there for you. They were there to help and support you. Rather than just being a flawed person, they become that comfort. That source of such a critical and sometimes unspoken need. That’s the part that sticks with you. When all else fails.

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Disney is sort of the king of trailblazing. Whether I mean Walt Disney or the Disney company is both unknown and indicative of the larger issue. What started off as a production company making short animated pieces like Steamboat Willie took a leap into making a feature film, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, and that led into the very famous place of dreams or theme park that no one could fathom as being profitable at the time. But all of that generated enough money for Disney to essentially set up multiple pots of intellectual properties and styles that poured out more success.

And that’s a really round about way of saying that Disney isn’t just a media company anymore. Factually, it is. It is its own media company that still has the theme parks, but Disney isn’t just a company or a stock. It’s more than a brand. It’s something individuals can and sometimes do embody, something that gets woven into dreams or games of pretend or daily aesthetics. 

For example, Disney Princesses aren’t just the female characters of certain canons. Rather, a Disney Princess is also the young child who admires the said princesses. But more than that, there is a genre of online content or influence or YouTube channels that just discuss the various intellectual properties, the lore behind Disney itself, or even make a living just visiting the various theme parks. People get the characters tattooed on their bodies, hoping that intellectual property law doesn’t come back to bite them. Visiting those parks is like the golden standard of family bonding. 

All in all, Disney is just part of contemporary living, and it was even before it started to grow like it did in recent years. It just fit a need many people had: the need for good quality stories, fairy tales or fairy tale-esque narratives that offer breaks from the harshness or monotony of daily living and the assurance that things are going to work out. Good will overcome evil, and if you are trapped within the clutches of evil, the hero will soon swoop in to save the day. 

When we were feeling down or when we were down, in Disney icons or tales we find the hope if not outright strength to life ourselves back up. For all its problems and whatever legitimate complaints or critiques can be offered against them, Disney started to provide, at some point, a different and very personal sort of service. At some point, it stopped just being about entertainment and became about something much deeper than that.

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The point is that it’s not just a brand anymore or a style of animation or a set of characters in or outside of a theme park. 

I’m sure there are many people who bought and rapidly watched everything on that platform without hesitation. They’ve just had it playing in front of them or in the background of their daily life seemingly nonstop, and when it’s all over, they’ll restart and do it all again. It may just be the stories to them. Or the memories all it evokes. But for me, it wasn’t just about that. Disney has become to me is this almost unrecognizeable entity, and it’s been hard to piece out exactly what that means.

Because, well, remember how I mentioned that it was my dad--who is now deceased--who bought me all of those VHSes, who cultivated whatever relationship I have with Disney as an entity. I hope you do because it hasn’t been that long and also it’s a very critical detail to the story.

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Dad died while VHSes were being fazed out of our lives in favor of the DVD and then Blu-ray and then all the other stuff that you probably know about. I had a DVD/VHS dual player in my bedroom, and I hardly ever used it. Until the day he died. In the days and weeks afterwards, I found that I couldn’t sleep. And can you blame me? My world was shifting, I felt like I had to grow up and take care of everyone, which I didn’t know how to do, so cue anxiety, and then there was this constant urge to cry because obviously.

In a state like that, you can lie in bed hoping to fall asleep, and if you can’t fall asleep, then you’re just lying in your own existential bed. I mean, dread. Actually what do I mean?

I didn’t want to think anymore about it, so I got up and put on Disney movies. I played movie after movie, often falling asleep in front of the television. Because that destructive diatribe that kept me up was silenced. Luckily I had a VHS rewinder too because I was that cool of a kid, making this whole thing even easier. But I fell asleep to the songs of Disney princesses, thinking about all the times Dad asked me who the characters were on the TV or the times he would guess the name and end up one letter or two off.

I thought about the time he and Mom took me to Disney World, how it was a surprise, and how muggy the Florida weather was at the time. I remember holding his hand as we walked through the park. I remembered the stuff Eeyore and him taking me, some years later, to Finding Nemo.

I thought about all those things, not about the things that would never be or would never be again. Just the moments I did have with him. 

And that might have been the last time I watched those VHS tapes, and sure, there were times when those movies came up again, but I never really sought them out. Not in the same way. Not in the way some other people might have. I was satiated in some regard. But that’s just one way of phrasing it. In reality, I had somewhat maxed out the utility of those movies, and any additional viewings would serve me less and less.

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Looking back, I’m not necessarily surprised that the Disney + streaming service didn’t have the knee-jerk appeal or wasn’t able to evoke the sort of reactionary consumeristic lust that it had in other people. Sure, Disney is in the business of selling tales that people will enjoy, but it will never be all about fun to me. And that’s true for a lot of people if not all of us, but I can’t speak for everyone else or the way it might manifest across the board. 

But for me, Disney’s just too entangle or entrenched into my life for me to want to engross myself in all of that content. Certainly not enough to justify the monthly cost. At all. After all, Disney’s movies might be great, but there are pieces of me that have changed this this into something else, something that can’t be as enjoyable to me. Right now. Maybe someday things will change, but hey, let’s be real, Disney’s got its own service and big influence over at Hulu. That content is not disappearing, it might just move around a bit.

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This has been a production of Miscellany Media Studios with music licensed from Sounds Like an Earful. Thank you for listening. If you like the show, please consider leaving a review or checking out our other productions.

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